Christmas Gifts

Out of the five students that I mentor at an after school program, there is one in particular that squeezes my heart a little more than the others. I have difficulty connecting with him, and I’m always trying to come up with ways to let him know that I care.

The other day was our last day before our Christmas break, so I thought I’d do something a little special for each of the students. Nothing too extraordinary, just some cute little mugs with their names on it and a package of hot cocoa with marshmallows. I thought it was a rather cute idea, and was excited to hand out the gifts.

As we were ending the afternoon and were packing up to leave the classroom, I handed the student his gift. But instead of thanking me or accepting it, he shrugged it away and said “nah, I don’t want it.”

Rather shocked that he would refuse a free gift (with marshmallows in it too!!) I asked just in case, “Are you sure? I made it for you! It even has your name on it.”

”I don’t want it.”

Not a single “Thank you, Ms. Jessica!” nor a “no thank you; I’m not a fan of hot cocoa,” or anything like that. As silly as it sounds, I felt like my gesture of love had been shot down. I stewed over it the rest of the evening and into the next day, surprised at how much it had hurt for him to deny something so menial.

But, oh, did it hurt even more when I realized the huge parallel that was drawn in this instance. I realized that this is exactly how Abba feels (times a million) when we deny His free gift. 

The God of the universe has wrapped His unattainable love in a package that we, by the sheer grace of God, can accept freely.  

Embroidered in the corners of His gift of mercy is our name, and though we have done nothing to deserve it, the Father bends down to us and rejoices at the thought of presenting us with this gift.

But what do we do? What do I do?

I shrug it off.

“I don’t need it, thanks anyway, Lord.”

“That’s nice, but I’m doing pretty swell on my own.”

Or sometimes it’s a brutally harsh “I don’t want your love.”

And I can only imagine God’s reaction at our denial. “Oh, my child. I did this for you. I died for you. I have called you mine since the beginning of time, and though I know every single thing you’ve ever done and said, and though I know that you don’t want this gift, it is still yours to take.”

We don’t get it. Our pride and sinful nature just don’t want to accept this.

Even though the Lover of my soul is heartbroken that I would ignore His gift of everlasting love and salvation, He repeatedly offers it again. and again. and again.

And He offers it to you the same.

“For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will- to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.” Ephesians 1:4-6

“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called Children of God! And that is what we are!” 1 John 3:1 

May this Christmas season remind you of the beautiful gift that has been made available to us. ❤

Rest

Lately I have been so tired. Tired in every aspect of the word. I am drained emotionally, physically, and my spirit within me is exhausted. This happens so often, and every time I find something to blame it on. The holidays, school, work, just life in general can make me tired. But when it comes down to it, I need Jesus. The only way I will receive rest is through Him.

In Mark 6:31, Jesus has compassion on His disciples and tells them, "come with Me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest." 

Ah, friend, read that verse again. Read it a hundred times and let the compassion and grace that is tangled in the words sweep over you.

Jesus asks four things of His disciples in this verse:

1. "Come with Me..."
    Me and Me alone. I am calling you to simply and surely come. Trust in Me, oh child, follow Me,         and come.

2. "by yourselves..."
    No distractions. No one else. I long for YOU. 

3. "to a quiet place..."
    I want to spend time with you. Just you and Me. I don't want loud and noisy distractions. I want the     solitude and stillness of your heart. Come, I will quiet your soul.

4. "get some rest." 
    You are too busy thinking and doing. Stop believing the lie that you have to perform to win My           love. I long to give you rest, weary one. I am gracious and compassionate, and in My eyes you will     find the rest that you so desperately need. 


If this is you, if you are tired and weary from whatever life is throwing at you, I pray that you will find the rest that you desire in the loving arms of Jesus Christ. Find peace, find joy, find His all-consuming love and just simply rest! He longs for you to come today.

"Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." -Matthew 11:28 


xo 

Sufficient

Weakness. It is something we all face at some point in our life. We all have already. I have definitely been facing it a lot lately, maybe even more than ever before. I am not talking physical weakness; I am talking the weakness where the weight of the world seems to be on your shoulders. Maybe it is because a friend has let you down, maybe you just cannot seem to bear with your family anymore, maybe your job is asking just too much of you, or it could be that you are simply struggling with day-to-day fears. When it comes down to it, weakness is weakness. We all know it well. 

For me, it seemed that everything was piling on top of each other. I was swimming in oceans of fear, unbelief, and pain, and with every muscle I moved while trying to tread its waters, I only became weaker. Just when I thought I had had enough, one more thing would pile on, and I would dive back under the currents. I was losing sleep, and was eating less; it was affecting my schoolwork, my relationship with my family and friends, and most importantly, my relationship with God. “Lord, when will you save me? Am I to drown in my weakness forever?” I would cry.   Over and over I would fall to my knees, inwardly screaming at God, asking why He was not delivering me from all that was out to crush me.

I am sure you all have felt like that at some point. The weight is unbearable sometimes. Like I said, I thought I would never keep my head above the waters. Yet God, in His faithful, loving way, lead me to read these verses just when I needed them the most.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

 -2 Corinthians 12:9-10

At first, I only thought it was a cool verse. It had a nice sound to it, and it temporarily made me feel better. “God gives me grace when I am weak. That is pretty neat.” I thought. But then these verses started reappearing every day. Seemingly everywhere I went, I would read or hear those words. People on the radio would mention it, skimming through my bible I would fall upon it, I would find it written in devotionals, and even my pastor used it in his sermon one Sunday! And as I started seeing this passage more and more, something began to happen inside of my small heart. With each reminder of this truth, its meaning grew deeper and deeper. It resonated first in my mind, then traveling down into my heart and soul, until once again I fell to my knees. But this time I fell not because of weakness. No this time, I crumbled from the weight of my Father's love and grace. Grace so heavy I could not hold it all of it; love so immaculate that I could not contain it.

"My grace is sufficient for you..."

God's grace is so vast, so immovable, that we do not have to ask for anything else. His grace covers everything. Through our hardships, His grace sustains us. It carries us. It never leaves. 

"My power is made perfect in weakness." 

You will have weak days. You will have weak months. You will have times of weakness where all you can do is call out His name. But friend, this verse offers so much hope, so much peace. When we give up our trials and fears to Jesus, He is able to turn weak into strong. He will lift you off of your feeble knees and onto His shoulders, soaring on wings like eagles. (Isaiah 40:29-31)

"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

Weaknesses will come. The world promises them. When they do, you have an option. You can let them weigh you down until you are falling apart. Or you can give them to the One who turns trials into triumph. You can use your weakness and boast of how your God is able to sustain you. And when you do that, the joy of the Lord will strengthen you.

"Then you will look and be radiant, and your heart will throb and swell with joy..." - Isaiah 60:5

 He is waiting ever so lovingly for you to give Him your weakness, my friend.

Let His power rule over you today. 

xo

Come

God has a strange way of getting my attention in the most peculiar of ways. Today, it was through my little dog and her beloved tennis ball.

Gabby is our little white and brown ball of fur. One of her favorite things to play with is her green tennis ball, and if you throw it you are guaranteed to be her best friend. We have trained her so that all you have to do is tap the ground in front of you, and she will go frantically searching the house for the ball and place it at your feet.

Earlier today I called our little dog to come sit up in the chair with me. Thinking that I wanted to play fetch, she instantly began searching the house looking for the little green ball. I called her over and over again, trying to get her attention back on me because I didn’t want her to bring it to me, I just wanted her. But her desperate searching had all of her focus, and I doubt she even heard me calling.

That’s when God hit me with one of His infamous “aha!” moments.

How many times do I answer God’s call by scrambling and searching for something good to bring in order for me to simply COME?

First I must find the perfect thing with which to praise Him.

First I must find a good deed

First I must have a happy heart.

I am constantly finding myself looking to lay something at my Savior’s feet in hopes of pleasing Him, when all He asks is that I come. Suddenly I could hear His tender voice reminding me of a beautiful, easily forgotten truth…

Beloved, do not believe the lie that you must find something good to bring in order to come to Me. All I want is you. When I call for you to come, you get so distracted by searching for something to offer. Stop your looking, stop your searching. It brings Me infinite amounts of joy when you simply come.

I am reminded of the two sisters who opened their home for Jesus. Mary, the one sitting at Jesus’ feet, listening to her Master, and Martha, the worrier, the preparer, the cook who was so distracted because she thought she had to DO.

”’Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed-or indeed only one.’”  -Luke 10:41-42

Are we more focused on finding that perfect thing before we go to the Lord? Are our thoughts and attention all on the retrieving, the doing, the preparing, when our hope and joy can be in simply sitting and listening at our Father’s feet?

My prayer is that you are able to stop your searching, obey the Saviors call, and come to Him. He is waiting.

xo

Hard Hearts, Soft Clouds

The truth is that on some days, joy hides its face. Some days you honestly don't want to even seek it. You just want to sit on your bed and mope and be grumpy and snap at everyone who walks by. It gives you some strange satisfaction, but then deep down inside you hate it. You hate not having joy and you hate that you don't have the guts to find it. It seems to be too hard to find. A waste of time. 

But I'm starting to realize that joy is hidden in the little things. The things that we so easily skip over and don't even think to look at. 

Today, despite my unnecessary grumpiness, I'm trying to find joy behind these white, puffy clouds. And if this is you too; if you're searching, or tired of searching, or refusing to search, then hear this:
don't give up. Keep looking, Love. 

xo

Sunday Morning with my Father

I see a dad singing with his young daughter on a stage. She is shy, even a little scared. He pulls her close into his arms, singing right along with her. The simple, familiar words ringing true: "Jesus loves me, this I know."

I see a father weeping from the abundance of love and pride for his little girl. She has decided to accept Christ into her heart and follow in baptism. He embraces her, his love for her growing by the second. In his heart he knows that this precious child is a gift from above.

I see a dad twirling his daughter around and around as she grips his fingers. Her dress spins, her soft curls bounce, and the little girl throws her head back in a soft laugh. The dad watches, eyes sparkling and heart swelling with joy.

And all at once I am overwhelmed by the sudden realization.

This is how my Father loves me.

My Father draws me close, singing His truth over me tenderly.
My Father is overjoyed when I choose Him, pride and joy ringing in His heart.
My Father delights in bringing me joy, seeing me laugh, and dancing with me each step of the way.

THANK you Lord for being our Father. 

"Yet you, Lord are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand." -Isaiah 64:8

"See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!" -1 John 3:1

"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom." -Luke 12:32

"A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling." Psalm 68:5

Stars in the Night

The other evening I went to sit outside and watch the stars as I sometimes do, and had my phone with me, checking it periodically. I soon came to realize that I really wasn't looking at the stars, but was mainly on my phone and the few times that I would briefly look up at the sky there really wasn't much to see. I figured it was just cloudy, and the stars were hidden.

I then decided to shut off my phone and really started looking. The longer I stared at the sky, with no interruptions and without turning on the electronic in my hand, more and more little stars popped up. Each distraction-free moment brought new stars to my vision, brighter and more twinkly than the next. The sky became darker, everything else faded away, but the galaxies seemed to roar.

That's when God spoke to me.

"Daughter, this is what happens when you focus your attention fully on Me, and Me alone. Just as looking away at an electronic makes it hard for you to see the stars that I set in place, turning your focus to distracting things in your life will make it hard to focus on Me. But when you set everything aside, and intentionally seek Me and run to Me with full force, everything else will grow strangely dim, and you will find Me like these stars in the night."

My, how that hit me. I forget how caught up I get with the distractions in my life. Friends, family, school, random activities, even church can be a huge distraction. So many times I have been so busy, not even realizing that I have stopped looking at Jesus. My gaze is no longer on Him, but on the world.

Excuses start slipping in, like "I didn't have time to do devotions because I need to get this paper done," or "I'm just so tired, I'll spend time with God tomorrow..." and then focusing on Him becomes even harder. My thoughts start getting lost in all of the tasks and activities the day holds, and before I realize it, I can't really see my Savior anymore. The world has overtaken my vision.

Here is what I am trying to say: we must daily, even hourly be intentional about drawing our gaze back to God. Just as I had to be intentional about shutting off my phone to be able to see the stars, we must make an effort to shut off the distractions that keep our attention from God.

"So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness." Colossians 2:6-7

"Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things." Colossians 3:2

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith..." Hebrews 12:1-2a 

"My heart says of you, 'Seek his face!' Your face, Lord, I will seek." -Psalm 27:8

Today, continue.
Today, keep seeking.

xo